Developing a deeper sense of self knowledge over the past five years has opened me up to a new connection to and with the world that almost feels like magic sometimes.
I'll be mediating on something in my life, usually causing me strife, and an experience I'm having will unlock a revelation that is directly related. Is it the mix of the soundtrack of Marvin Gaye's I Want You in the background, sunshine streaming through the windows, and the promise of the weekend? A universe-level alignment? Years of therapy? A tender heart? Probably all of those things and more.
That's my current scene as another of those moments unfolded today as I was reading an article about dating during Coronavirus, something I've been wrecking my own brain with. I'm finding it interesting how much of a person can revealed when having a conversation about how we feel safe dating now. I have a digital first mentality so video chat, phone calls, and texting. There is a threshold I reach where I've learned enough about a person and how they move through the world that develops a new level of trust which makes me comfortable with in-person meetings.
Coronavirus has been a unique in dating for me that my perception of trust, and how it develops, has changed. I have not always been so thoughtful about whether I have someone's trust, or if they have mine, and I think it also has a lot to do with one's trust in themselves.
I live for days like today now. I've heard it described before as "vibrating at the frequency of the universe" and I almost instinctively would roll my eyes at it but I'm starting to understand what that means for me. This has been one version of the phrase's meaning.